[There's a flush rising in her cheeks too, because her impulse finally catches up with her now that she's on the other end of it. But, she's never one to refuse sweets, even tangy ones like this. So she tucks her hair behind her ear and leans in, neatly accepting his offering and pulling back with a pleased curve to her lips.
Life in this desert isn't terrible, but it's been so long since she's had something truly cold.]
And to think, I just picked up this shop as a way to kill time.
[It's a bit funny, in retrospect, but—]
I'm... not really sure what I'll do with the money, besides maybe upgrade the building a bit.
[She taps the spoon in her hand against her lip, thoughtful.]
[ He nods along with her thoughts, leaning in to take the spoon in his mouth. ]
Ah, well—
[ initially he goes quiet to simply eat the contents on the spoon, but it becomes clear he's not quite sure what to say —and not because he doesn't know. (For a moments it was like it didn't ever happen). ]
I just feel stupid for thinking my first impression of him was wrong.
[ the invisible cat ears are very much dropping right now over this. ]
Yeah. Something like that. [ slave his sounds so pathetic .... pet even worse. ]
Just, I don't second guess often, especially for a more positive light. And of course, doing it here and being wrong is a big blow to the ego. [ amongst other things.
But, it's fine. Because according to gilgamesh no one else cares about him, anyway, so he's got limited options unless he wants to be alone.. ]
[ He nods slowly. Of course, Masamune knew he was dangerous, he just neglected to realize how he was dangerous and only created small pieces. But, when she puts her hand on his shoulder and asks that, calling him a friend... it's conflicting.
On one hand, he really wants to believe her. She's been nothing but sincere to him and although he met her after Gilgamesh, it was less than an hour apart. So it isn't even as if he's known her for less time.
However, Gilgamesh's words are not just bad thoughts. The mantra that weaves Masamune's doubts for everyone else is soaked into his very skin. It's disgusting, he feels almost broken but not in a way he knows how to fix and get back to his feet again.
He also knows that there is some connection between the two of them since he butted in for Gilgamesh threatening to torch her shop if he were displeased and she was way better at holding her own than he could defend her.
(In the end he couldn't even defend himself, how miserable.)
But... because of that he can't bring himself to speak real words. One, because he doesn't want to make Gilgamesh look worse than however Hakuno views him if Gilgamesh wants her attention (even if... he feels a little fussy over the thought, but that's another story). Two, however, is the fact although he knows what happened, his feelings don't really allow him to articulate any of it. Every thought negative word is echoed by a correction to lighten the damnation. Gilgamesh didn't do anything wrong, it was Masamune's own fault for what he got.
(And again shouldn't he be happy to be so cared about?
—actually, Masamune wants to believe that but it also falls short. This dragon is damn empty currently.) ]
He's just... he bullies and demands things his way, only cares about himself unless it benefits him to care, and he's annoying and naggy.
[ It's all true, of course. It's just that's not the answer he knows is the real one to her question. ]
It's fine. [ he brings a hand up to place over hers. ] I'm Okay. If I get to spend time with people like you.
[ &mdasg;except they're all fake, too, right? He feels very hurt by that for some reason. Masamune really wants to believe this girl means it when she says she's his friend.
So why...? ]
That whole dream ordeal was kind of rough, though. I didn't appreciate getting strangled by him, even if I stabbed him first. Hmph, I was just fixing his problem like he asked.
—and I don't want to share my time with you with him so it's even less worth it. [ lost time with her is not worth sacrificing. ]
[Her brows twitch together, her concern now a towering mountain and not slowing down any time soon.]
The thing is, he has this... this charisma. He can make you believe just about anything, if he has enough time and reason to do it. Or... if he's bored enough, I suppose. It's... He's a person who lives by his whims and passions without any morals guiding them.
[She squeezes his shoulder, a look of pain flitting across her face as she thinks back to the dreams she herself lived. In one, Gilgamesh had killed himself rather than leave her to die alone. In another, he stood helpless and frozen as they both faced down a disguised monster willing to slaughter them both.]
...I care about you. So, even if you don't think it's worth it, I think you're worth it. He... he can do a lot of damage, when he wants to. He's an ancient warrior king, and he hasn't mellowed at all with age.
[ Masamune snaps a little defensively at that. It's not directed at her personally, but he is undoubtedly frustrated.
As a samurai, it makes sense for him to reject such a descriptor. Gilgamesh is no skill, all power.
But, of course, it is a difficult position for Hakuno most of all. She is aware of Gilgamesh's bad side but seen the good as well.
So far, Masamune has seen nothing but the bad and the manipulation. ]
Charisma, huh? Yeah, sounds about right.
[ The little dragon becomes frustrated because he can't speak directly ill of the other: because accusing him of cruel and manipulative rape is only immediately countered with voices hounding him that he consented, that he loved all of it anyway. He was given exactly what he wanted and it was something he only felt resentful towards because he was so addicted to it he was feeling withdrawal.
Besides, shouldn't he feel awful? That person loves him. Is the only person that loves him. Even if he hates him, he will—
(Everything sounds like a lie now, even his own convictions) ]
I really hate him...
[ There is so much venom in Masamune's voice, suggesting it's deep rooted and not fake words, but that he's struggling to say it. Being outside of his manipulative range is the only thing allowing the young lord to even speak in pieces. ]
I just want to die and be left alone, but he won't let me. I can't live like this, I'm a fucking dragon! I can't stand it, it's disgusting how pathetic I am. Even he is going to trash me when he's done— maybe he already has.
[ Shifting a little, he sighs as he considers, almost defeated sounding. ]
So... I don't understand why you would want to bother caring for me. You don't know me and I certainly don't deserve it.
[ He doesn't deserve anything. Isn't that why he's supposed to be so grateful for Gilgamesh?
...But he really likes Hakuno. In fact, she and Yukimura are perhaps more than anyone all he cares about being wanted by on his own merit. Hell, if he could be convinced they really cared—they don't have to desire him, he just wants friends to stay with and curl up with at night and laugh with and fight alongside and protect and be protected and face life as it comes—he thinks he could get over even Gilgamesh instead of feeling an intense need to linger.
(The longer he stays away from the golden King, the better it is for him. ]
Don't worry about it okay? I'm just being a brat and being unfair to him, I guess.
[Her concern just punched through the atmosphere.]
Not in the way your culture would accept. But he fought, and pillaged, and ruled when the whim took him. And... and in all the thousands and thousands of years he has existed, there has only ever been one individual that he ever truly loved, saw as a friend, viewed as an equal. Just one, and everyone since has just been some form of... of amusement, on one level of another.
[She leans in and wraps her arms around him in a tight hug. There's a protective cast to it, like she can feel the cracks just beneath the surface and is trying to keep them from coming apart through sheer force of will alone. He's so hurt, and it stokes a deep ember of the rage she had felt upon first gaining the memories of her other-world Body. She squeezes him, like one of them might fly away if she lets go.]
Whatever he did to you, whatever he said, don't take his warped, self-indulgent ego as fact. No matter what he thinks, reality doesn't hinge on his point of view; you aren't trash. Whatever he might think or say, you aren't. Historically, people will care about you more, know far more about you than some dusty old legend of Babylon. He's a brat and unfair, automatically, not you. You're... you're my friend, aren't you? So, please don't say such terrible things like you mean them. Because—
[She pulls back just enough to look him in the eye, still not letting him go.]
Because I do care about you, and I get mad when anyone insults the people precious to me. I want to know you more. I want to cherish you more. I don't... I don't want you near someone who can hurt you like this.
[ It's very strange to feel someone hugging onto him so protectively without any sense of obligation or an expectation of something in return. To say he doesn't like it, though... well, it would be a lie.
Of course, Masamune listens to her quietly, and while a lot of what she says is hard for him to believe (or maybe not so hard, he doesn't know), what sticks with him is that she is either a really good actor (far better than Gilgamesh, he wouldn't be able to feign this) or is quite sincere. Although he is almost paranoid suspicious now, he smiles a little if only because she doesn't talk like the others. She is straightforward and sincere, wearing her heart on her sleeve. ]
Sorry. [ He says it softly, but sincerely, offering to gently touch his head against hers affectionately. ] I don't want to say unkind things to you.
[ Moving his arm that is caught between their bodies, he wraps it around her to small waist to bring her a boy closer and pull her halfway into his lap. ]
I don't know why, but if that's what you want, how can I say no to you? You are the only one here I've met that holds no judgment for anyone despite fully understanding the situation. [ Of course he feels a special connection to her, too, as she is the one he first became intimidate with here as a result of the world, but... he didn't regret it. She was kind to him and fun and loving, what more could he ask for?
And now, she's really gone out of her way because she was worried about his sleep and ... she has so many better things to do than worry about him. ]
I will not worry you. I will stay away from him. [ Gilgamesh will only notice once he's bored and he has plenty to occupy himself with currently. And he probably won't even care, so really... he's the only one hanging around to be treated badly. ]
I will spend the extra time getting to know you better when you want to, yeah? Because you are also precious to me.
If the truth is unkind, that's one thing. But saying that you're trash or without worth is a lie, and I don't want to hear those from you. ...please.
[She follows his motion and moves more fully onto his lap, nestling her head against his. Some of the tension eases out of her frame at that promise, though it feels like she's started an uphill battle of sorts.]
If you want to, you can stay here. It isn't exactly palatial, and I've got a few others bunking down here too, but... the offer is always, always going to be open. And if there's somewhere else you'd rather be, I can move the futon over there. I just... I want you to be comfortable, instead of hurting.
I will stay here. [ He doesn't mind others—he's used to being with his men at camp and it's preferred to being alone. It wasn't as if he lived with Gilgamesh anymore than he could help it. As soon as attention waned, he would leave until he was dragged back again. No matter what he thought and believed about himself and the other, he knew he was useless around there if he wasn't catering to the king. So, he doesn't stay, especially after being strangled in that dreamscape.
When Gilgamesh wants him there he goes back. So why can't he do the same and stay with Hakuno if she wants him here? ]
There is absolutely no place I would rather be. [ Gently, he places a kiss to her temple before returning to having his head nuzzled against hers. ]
I know you are right. You're just the first person who's said it to me. [ Luckily he is not so far gone he can't escape the manipulation with the culprit absent. Someone to remind him that it's not him is apparently what he needs. There aren't that many people who care about anyone enough to do such things without being given reason. And Masamune's is not good with telling others of his weaknesses.
(Because he believes he is a failure, that he wasn't strong enough and he should have been to get away from the Servant. Regardless of everything, what kind of dragon would ever let that happen to them...?) ]
So, yeah, I will stay. As long as I'm not taking up space you need, that is.
Don't be silly. I'm not so generous that I would make an offer like that to be polite. You're welcome here, Masamune.
[She kisses him on the cheek, firmly, to make a point and to underline her own affection that much more. It feels increasingly obvious that he needs it, and she's more than happy to oblige.]
Good. Now, say something nice about yourself, and I'll let you finish your treat.
[ sounds weird, he realizes. He's actually quite cocky when he's himself and so his ego certainly doesn't suffer. However, it's usually not shown in saying flattering things about himself so much as suggesting others aren't up to par.
Still, he seems to take well to her affection, because he's asking as if he needs clarification, not so much that he refuses. He also continues to hold her, not seeming so interested to otherwise part with her being so close. ]
[She fidgets slightly in his hold, but not in order to get loose. She settles herself in his lap more comfortably once she has her bowl and spoon back in her hands, and loads up a spoonful as she snuggles back against his chest. She raises it up, temptingly.]
One nice thing about you or something you can do, for this. One more for the bento box I originally called you about. And a third one before we go to bed. That seems fair, right?
[ Masamune exhales as if being put through some trying situation. However there is also a light heartedness to it that suggests it is not viewed in such a way at all. At the very least, he seems happy to be with her, to talk with her and hold onto her in his lap even as he rests his chin on her shoulder to peer at the spoon and bowl Hakuno holds. ]
...I guess but only because you made the bento and you're going to sleep with me. [ otherwise this would be super unfair. ]
[Well, she's also going to give him the show of actually summoning up the bento, but she'll leave that as a surprise after Slef-Compliment Number Two. She waggles the spoon at him, managing not to dislodge the ice scooped onto it.]
[She beams back at him, and obligingly guides the spoon to his mouth, preparing another one as soon as he's eaten it. She'll keep going at whatever pace he likes.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Life in this desert isn't terrible, but it's been so long since she's had something truly cold.]
And to think, I just picked up this shop as a way to kill time.
[It's a bit funny, in retrospect, but—]
I'm... not really sure what I'll do with the money, besides maybe upgrade the building a bit.
[She taps the spoon in her hand against her lip, thoughtful.]
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Maybe you could buy a city and clean its act up?
[ I mean big dreams have to start somewhere, right? ]
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[She laughs softly, and readies another scoop for him with a rueful shake of her head.]
That's a little too close to the sort of conquest I had to do back home, I think. This is supposed to just be a way to kill time.
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Delivery options and street carts here?
[ He suggests innocently, a much lower scale of an ambition but seems like a good way to him to kill time. ]
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[She holds up the spoon to his mouth again, her expression thoughtful.]
What about you? How are you spending your free time these days?
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Ah, well—
[ initially he goes quiet to simply eat the contents on the spoon, but it becomes clear he's not quite sure what to say —and not because he doesn't know. (For a moments it was like it didn't ever happen). ]
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[She pauses after pulling back the spoon and readying another scoop. His silence has stretched just a bit too long, and it's... concerning.]
...Masamune?
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[ He huffs, making a slight face. ]
Just being a carpet to a lazy spoiled king I lost a bet to.
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[Her brow furrows at that last part.]
...carpet?
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[ the invisible cat ears are very much dropping right now over this. ]
Yeah. Something like that. [ slave his sounds so pathetic .... pet even worse. ]
Just, I don't second guess often, especially for a more positive light. And of course, doing it here and being wrong is a big blow to the ego. [ amongst other things.
But, it's fine. Because according to gilgamesh no one else cares about him, anyway, so he's got limited options unless he wants to be alone.. ]
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[She sets the spoon over, and gently touches his shoulder. Her concern is deepening by the minute.]
Hey. Hey. What did he do? Do I need to go find him and yell at him for hurting my friend?
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On one hand, he really wants to believe her. She's been nothing but sincere to him and although he met her after Gilgamesh, it was less than an hour apart. So it isn't even as if he's known her for less time.
However, Gilgamesh's words are not just bad thoughts. The mantra that weaves Masamune's doubts for everyone else is soaked into his very skin. It's disgusting, he feels almost broken but not in a way he knows how to fix and get back to his feet again.
He also knows that there is some connection between the two of them since he butted in for Gilgamesh threatening to torch her shop if he were displeased and she was way better at holding her own than he could defend her.
(In the end he couldn't even defend himself, how miserable.)
But... because of that he can't bring himself to speak real words. One, because he doesn't want to make Gilgamesh look worse than however Hakuno views him if Gilgamesh wants her attention (even if... he feels a little fussy over the thought, but that's another story). Two, however, is the fact although he knows what happened, his feelings don't really allow him to articulate any of it. Every thought negative word is echoed by a correction to lighten the damnation. Gilgamesh didn't do anything wrong, it was Masamune's own fault for what he got.
(And again shouldn't he be happy to be so cared about?
—actually, Masamune wants to believe that but it also falls short. This dragon is damn empty currently.) ]
He's just... he bullies and demands things his way, only cares about himself unless it benefits him to care, and he's annoying and naggy.
[ It's all true, of course. It's just that's not the answer he knows is the real one to her question. ]
It's fine. [ he brings a hand up to place over hers. ] I'm Okay. If I get to spend time with people like you.
[ &mdasg;except they're all fake, too, right? He feels very hurt by that for some reason. Masamune really wants to believe this girl means it when she says she's his friend.
So why...? ]
That whole dream ordeal was kind of rough, though. I didn't appreciate getting strangled by him, even if I stabbed him first. Hmph, I was just fixing his problem like he asked.
—and I don't want to share my time with you with him so it's even less worth it. [ lost time with her is not worth sacrificing. ]
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[Her brows twitch together, her concern now a towering mountain and not slowing down any time soon.]
The thing is, he has this... this charisma. He can make you believe just about anything, if he has enough time and reason to do it. Or... if he's bored enough, I suppose. It's... He's a person who lives by his whims and passions without any morals guiding them.
[She squeezes his shoulder, a look of pain flitting across her face as she thinks back to the dreams she herself lived. In one, Gilgamesh had killed himself rather than leave her to die alone. In another, he stood helpless and frozen as they both faced down a disguised monster willing to slaughter them both.]
...I care about you. So, even if you don't think it's worth it, I think you're worth it. He... he can do a lot of damage, when he wants to. He's an ancient warrior king, and he hasn't mellowed at all with age.
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[ Masamune snaps a little defensively at that. It's not directed at her personally, but he is undoubtedly frustrated.
As a samurai, it makes sense for him to reject such a descriptor. Gilgamesh is no skill, all power.
But, of course, it is a difficult position for Hakuno most of all. She is aware of Gilgamesh's bad side but seen the good as well.
So far, Masamune has seen nothing but the bad and the manipulation. ]
Charisma, huh? Yeah, sounds about right.
[ The little dragon becomes frustrated because he can't speak directly ill of the other: because accusing him of cruel and manipulative rape is only immediately countered with voices hounding him that he consented, that he loved all of it anyway. He was given exactly what he wanted and it was something he only felt resentful towards because he was so addicted to it he was feeling withdrawal.
Besides, shouldn't he feel awful? That person loves him. Is the only person that loves him. Even if he hates him, he will—
(Everything sounds like a lie now, even his own convictions)
]
I really hate him...
[ There is so much venom in Masamune's voice, suggesting it's deep rooted and not fake words, but that he's struggling to say it. Being outside of his manipulative range is the only thing allowing the young lord to even speak in pieces. ]
I just want to die and be left alone, but he won't let me. I can't live like this, I'm a fucking dragon! I can't stand it, it's disgusting how pathetic I am. Even he is going to trash me when he's done— maybe he already has.
[ Shifting a little, he sighs as he considers, almost defeated sounding. ]
So... I don't understand why you would want to bother caring for me. You don't know me and I certainly don't deserve it.
[ He doesn't deserve anything. Isn't that why he's supposed to be so grateful for Gilgamesh?
...But he really likes Hakuno. In fact, she and Yukimura are perhaps more than anyone all he cares about being wanted by on his own merit. Hell, if he could be convinced they really cared—they don't have to desire him, he just wants friends to stay with and curl up with at night and laugh with and fight alongside and protect and be protected and face life as it comes—he thinks he could get over even Gilgamesh instead of feeling an intense need to linger.
(The longer he stays away from the golden King, the better it is for him. ]
Don't worry about it okay? I'm just being a brat and being unfair to him, I guess.
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Not in the way your culture would accept. But he fought, and pillaged, and ruled when the whim took him. And... and in all the thousands and thousands of years he has existed, there has only ever been one individual that he ever truly loved, saw as a friend, viewed as an equal. Just one, and everyone since has just been some form of... of amusement, on one level of another.
[She leans in and wraps her arms around him in a tight hug. There's a protective cast to it, like she can feel the cracks just beneath the surface and is trying to keep them from coming apart through sheer force of will alone. He's so hurt, and it stokes a deep ember of the rage she had felt upon first gaining the memories of her other-world Body. She squeezes him, like one of them might fly away if she lets go.]
Whatever he did to you, whatever he said, don't take his warped, self-indulgent ego as fact. No matter what he thinks, reality doesn't hinge on his point of view; you aren't trash. Whatever he might think or say, you aren't. Historically, people will care about you more, know far more about you than some dusty old legend of Babylon. He's a brat and unfair, automatically, not you. You're... you're my friend, aren't you? So, please don't say such terrible things like you mean them. Because—
[She pulls back just enough to look him in the eye, still not letting him go.]
Because I do care about you, and I get mad when anyone insults the people precious to me. I want to know you more. I want to cherish you more. I don't... I don't want you near someone who can hurt you like this.
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Of course, Masamune listens to her quietly, and while a lot of what she says is hard for him to believe (or maybe not so hard, he doesn't know), what sticks with him is that she is either a really good actor (far better than Gilgamesh, he wouldn't be able to feign this) or is quite sincere. Although he is almost paranoid suspicious now, he smiles a little if only because she doesn't talk like the others. She is straightforward and sincere, wearing her heart on her sleeve. ]
Sorry. [ He says it softly, but sincerely, offering to gently touch his head against hers affectionately. ] I don't want to say unkind things to you.
[ Moving his arm that is caught between their bodies, he wraps it around her to small waist to bring her a boy closer and pull her halfway into his lap. ]
I don't know why, but if that's what you want, how can I say no to you? You are the only one here I've met that holds no judgment for anyone despite fully understanding the situation. [ Of course he feels a special connection to her, too, as she is the one he first became intimidate with here as a result of the world, but... he didn't regret it. She was kind to him and fun and loving, what more could he ask for?
And now, she's really gone out of her way because she was worried about his sleep and ... she has so many better things to do than worry about him. ]
I will not worry you. I will stay away from him. [ Gilgamesh will only notice once he's bored and he has plenty to occupy himself with currently. And he probably won't even care, so really... he's the only one hanging around to be treated badly. ]
I will spend the extra time getting to know you better when you want to, yeah? Because you are also precious to me.
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[She follows his motion and moves more fully onto his lap, nestling her head against his. Some of the tension eases out of her frame at that promise, though it feels like she's started an uphill battle of sorts.]
If you want to, you can stay here. It isn't exactly palatial, and I've got a few others bunking down here too, but... the offer is always, always going to be open. And if there's somewhere else you'd rather be, I can move the futon over there. I just... I want you to be comfortable, instead of hurting.
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When Gilgamesh wants him there he goes back. So why can't he do the same and stay with Hakuno if she wants him here? ]
There is absolutely no place I would rather be. [ Gently, he places a kiss to her temple before returning to having his head nuzzled against hers. ]
I know you are right. You're just the first person who's said it to me. [ Luckily he is not so far gone he can't escape the manipulation with the culprit absent. Someone to remind him that it's not him is apparently what he needs. There aren't that many people who care about anyone enough to do such things without being given reason. And Masamune's is not good with telling others of his weaknesses.
(Because he believes he is a failure, that he wasn't strong enough and he should have been to get away from the Servant. Regardless of everything, what kind of dragon would ever let that happen to them...?) ]
So, yeah, I will stay. As long as I'm not taking up space you need, that is.
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[She kisses him on the cheek, firmly, to make a point and to underline her own affection that much more. It feels increasingly obvious that he needs it, and she's more than happy to oblige.]
Good. Now, say something nice about yourself, and I'll let you finish your treat.
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[ sounds weird, he realizes. He's actually quite cocky when he's himself and so his ego certainly doesn't suffer. However, it's usually not shown in saying flattering things about himself so much as suggesting others aren't up to par.
Still, he seems to take well to her affection, because he's asking as if he needs clarification, not so much that he refuses. He also continues to hold her, not seeming so interested to otherwise part with her being so close. ]
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[She fidgets slightly in his hold, but not in order to get loose. She settles herself in his lap more comfortably once she has her bowl and spoon back in her hands, and loads up a spoonful as she snuggles back against his chest. She raises it up, temptingly.]
One nice thing about you or something you can do, for this. One more for the bento box I originally called you about. And a third one before we go to bed. That seems fair, right?
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[ Masamune exhales as if being put through some trying situation. However there is also a light heartedness to it that suggests it is not viewed in such a way at all. At the very least, he seems happy to be with her, to talk with her and hold onto her in his lap even as he rests his chin on her shoulder to peer at the spoon and bowl Hakuno holds. ]
...I guess but only because you made the bento and you're going to sleep with me. [ otherwise this would be super unfair. ]
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[Well, she's also going to give him the show of actually summoning up the bento, but she'll leave that as a surprise after Slef-Compliment Number Two. She waggles the spoon at him, managing not to dislodge the ice scooped onto it.]
So. Let's hear it, Dragon of Oushu.
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[ He puffs his cheeks a little, them tinging pink, as he tries to think of something nice to say about himself. ]
I'm a good leader.
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[She beams back at him, and obligingly guides the spoon to his mouth, preparing another one as soon as he's eaten it. She'll keep going at whatever pace he likes.]
That wasn't too hard, was it?
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