[ Masamune snaps a little defensively at that. It's not directed at her personally, but he is undoubtedly frustrated.
As a samurai, it makes sense for him to reject such a descriptor. Gilgamesh is no skill, all power.
But, of course, it is a difficult position for Hakuno most of all. She is aware of Gilgamesh's bad side but seen the good as well.
So far, Masamune has seen nothing but the bad and the manipulation. ]
Charisma, huh? Yeah, sounds about right.
[ The little dragon becomes frustrated because he can't speak directly ill of the other: because accusing him of cruel and manipulative rape is only immediately countered with voices hounding him that he consented, that he loved all of it anyway. He was given exactly what he wanted and it was something he only felt resentful towards because he was so addicted to it he was feeling withdrawal.
Besides, shouldn't he feel awful? That person loves him. Is the only person that loves him. Even if he hates him, he will—
(Everything sounds like a lie now, even his own convictions) ]
I really hate him...
[ There is so much venom in Masamune's voice, suggesting it's deep rooted and not fake words, but that he's struggling to say it. Being outside of his manipulative range is the only thing allowing the young lord to even speak in pieces. ]
I just want to die and be left alone, but he won't let me. I can't live like this, I'm a fucking dragon! I can't stand it, it's disgusting how pathetic I am. Even he is going to trash me when he's done— maybe he already has.
[ Shifting a little, he sighs as he considers, almost defeated sounding. ]
So... I don't understand why you would want to bother caring for me. You don't know me and I certainly don't deserve it.
[ He doesn't deserve anything. Isn't that why he's supposed to be so grateful for Gilgamesh?
...But he really likes Hakuno. In fact, she and Yukimura are perhaps more than anyone all he cares about being wanted by on his own merit. Hell, if he could be convinced they really cared—they don't have to desire him, he just wants friends to stay with and curl up with at night and laugh with and fight alongside and protect and be protected and face life as it comes—he thinks he could get over even Gilgamesh instead of feeling an intense need to linger.
(The longer he stays away from the golden King, the better it is for him. ]
Don't worry about it okay? I'm just being a brat and being unfair to him, I guess.
[Her concern just punched through the atmosphere.]
Not in the way your culture would accept. But he fought, and pillaged, and ruled when the whim took him. And... and in all the thousands and thousands of years he has existed, there has only ever been one individual that he ever truly loved, saw as a friend, viewed as an equal. Just one, and everyone since has just been some form of... of amusement, on one level of another.
[She leans in and wraps her arms around him in a tight hug. There's a protective cast to it, like she can feel the cracks just beneath the surface and is trying to keep them from coming apart through sheer force of will alone. He's so hurt, and it stokes a deep ember of the rage she had felt upon first gaining the memories of her other-world Body. She squeezes him, like one of them might fly away if she lets go.]
Whatever he did to you, whatever he said, don't take his warped, self-indulgent ego as fact. No matter what he thinks, reality doesn't hinge on his point of view; you aren't trash. Whatever he might think or say, you aren't. Historically, people will care about you more, know far more about you than some dusty old legend of Babylon. He's a brat and unfair, automatically, not you. You're... you're my friend, aren't you? So, please don't say such terrible things like you mean them. Because—
[She pulls back just enough to look him in the eye, still not letting him go.]
Because I do care about you, and I get mad when anyone insults the people precious to me. I want to know you more. I want to cherish you more. I don't... I don't want you near someone who can hurt you like this.
[ It's very strange to feel someone hugging onto him so protectively without any sense of obligation or an expectation of something in return. To say he doesn't like it, though... well, it would be a lie.
Of course, Masamune listens to her quietly, and while a lot of what she says is hard for him to believe (or maybe not so hard, he doesn't know), what sticks with him is that she is either a really good actor (far better than Gilgamesh, he wouldn't be able to feign this) or is quite sincere. Although he is almost paranoid suspicious now, he smiles a little if only because she doesn't talk like the others. She is straightforward and sincere, wearing her heart on her sleeve. ]
Sorry. [ He says it softly, but sincerely, offering to gently touch his head against hers affectionately. ] I don't want to say unkind things to you.
[ Moving his arm that is caught between their bodies, he wraps it around her to small waist to bring her a boy closer and pull her halfway into his lap. ]
I don't know why, but if that's what you want, how can I say no to you? You are the only one here I've met that holds no judgment for anyone despite fully understanding the situation. [ Of course he feels a special connection to her, too, as she is the one he first became intimidate with here as a result of the world, but... he didn't regret it. She was kind to him and fun and loving, what more could he ask for?
And now, she's really gone out of her way because she was worried about his sleep and ... she has so many better things to do than worry about him. ]
I will not worry you. I will stay away from him. [ Gilgamesh will only notice once he's bored and he has plenty to occupy himself with currently. And he probably won't even care, so really... he's the only one hanging around to be treated badly. ]
I will spend the extra time getting to know you better when you want to, yeah? Because you are also precious to me.
If the truth is unkind, that's one thing. But saying that you're trash or without worth is a lie, and I don't want to hear those from you. ...please.
[She follows his motion and moves more fully onto his lap, nestling her head against his. Some of the tension eases out of her frame at that promise, though it feels like she's started an uphill battle of sorts.]
If you want to, you can stay here. It isn't exactly palatial, and I've got a few others bunking down here too, but... the offer is always, always going to be open. And if there's somewhere else you'd rather be, I can move the futon over there. I just... I want you to be comfortable, instead of hurting.
I will stay here. [ He doesn't mind others—he's used to being with his men at camp and it's preferred to being alone. It wasn't as if he lived with Gilgamesh anymore than he could help it. As soon as attention waned, he would leave until he was dragged back again. No matter what he thought and believed about himself and the other, he knew he was useless around there if he wasn't catering to the king. So, he doesn't stay, especially after being strangled in that dreamscape.
When Gilgamesh wants him there he goes back. So why can't he do the same and stay with Hakuno if she wants him here? ]
There is absolutely no place I would rather be. [ Gently, he places a kiss to her temple before returning to having his head nuzzled against hers. ]
I know you are right. You're just the first person who's said it to me. [ Luckily he is not so far gone he can't escape the manipulation with the culprit absent. Someone to remind him that it's not him is apparently what he needs. There aren't that many people who care about anyone enough to do such things without being given reason. And Masamune's is not good with telling others of his weaknesses.
(Because he believes he is a failure, that he wasn't strong enough and he should have been to get away from the Servant. Regardless of everything, what kind of dragon would ever let that happen to them...?) ]
So, yeah, I will stay. As long as I'm not taking up space you need, that is.
Don't be silly. I'm not so generous that I would make an offer like that to be polite. You're welcome here, Masamune.
[She kisses him on the cheek, firmly, to make a point and to underline her own affection that much more. It feels increasingly obvious that he needs it, and she's more than happy to oblige.]
Good. Now, say something nice about yourself, and I'll let you finish your treat.
[ sounds weird, he realizes. He's actually quite cocky when he's himself and so his ego certainly doesn't suffer. However, it's usually not shown in saying flattering things about himself so much as suggesting others aren't up to par.
Still, he seems to take well to her affection, because he's asking as if he needs clarification, not so much that he refuses. He also continues to hold her, not seeming so interested to otherwise part with her being so close. ]
[She fidgets slightly in his hold, but not in order to get loose. She settles herself in his lap more comfortably once she has her bowl and spoon back in her hands, and loads up a spoonful as she snuggles back against his chest. She raises it up, temptingly.]
One nice thing about you or something you can do, for this. One more for the bento box I originally called you about. And a third one before we go to bed. That seems fair, right?
[ Masamune exhales as if being put through some trying situation. However there is also a light heartedness to it that suggests it is not viewed in such a way at all. At the very least, he seems happy to be with her, to talk with her and hold onto her in his lap even as he rests his chin on her shoulder to peer at the spoon and bowl Hakuno holds. ]
...I guess but only because you made the bento and you're going to sleep with me. [ otherwise this would be super unfair. ]
[Well, she's also going to give him the show of actually summoning up the bento, but she'll leave that as a surprise after Slef-Compliment Number Two. She waggles the spoon at him, managing not to dislodge the ice scooped onto it.]
[She beams back at him, and obligingly guides the spoon to his mouth, preparing another one as soon as he's eaten it. She'll keep going at whatever pace he likes.]
[ Especially since it's not something that can currently be proven otherwise. Still, as he goes to think of another thing... all that comes up is much the same. Battle. War. Violence. Strategy. Everything falls under the same thing: he is a warrior, a weapon seeking blood for power and peace. He's not saying he is going to be bad at everything else outside of war, but considering the most he's done is cool and read and learned a few things here and there of no consequence, it's a fair uncertainty when trying to think of examples.
It doesn't bother him overall, he's confident he'll get by, but it is not helpful with suddenly feeling there is so little to grasp outside the umbrella of war. ]
Everything else I can think of saying falls understand the same category, I guess... I'm a good horseman, I'm good at turning battles around, I'm good at taking advantage of openings... not getting myself killed. Those sorts of things.
What sort of games did you play, when you were little?
[He's earned his pampering entirely, so she doesn't stop feeding him. When the bowl is empty, he summons up the finest of the Sakura obento series and continues offering him bites from the top layer. Now she's just personally curious, because...
Well, because most of her skills are tied to war, too, but she has never had a childhood preceding it.]
Given the period, I'll bet a lot were for strategy or play-fighting, but...
[ He's glad it wasn't insufficent, less for the food and more for not wanting to disappoint her. So while he definitely eats what she gives him, he takes the time to stop and think about her question... or rather, how to best answer what he already knows without it sounding bad. ]
I... uh, didn't play much of anything when I was young. The only time I got away from my studies was for training or when I ran off on Kojuro.
[ Which he still felt was totally worth all the punishment for that one time he ran into a bunch of ronin thugs harassing a small Yukimura. ] When I was, it was mostly alone but I guess I did a lot of daydreaming about how I was going to do everything right and make myself known and see my rival again.
[ because tiny Masamune's spent half his life waiting for it to pass to make good on a promise he never thought see. That's one good thing about this place, in addition to meeting Hakuno himself. Considering the last he remembers is being harassed about Yukimura being in the area and him not even knowing it and being used against him, he had to wonder... ]
[She trails off in thought, and the next bite of food finds its way to her mouth instead. She chews pensively as she reflects on it. Nero had called Elizabeth and Altera her rivals, and had seemed to value the dynamic quite a bit. Tamamo... had viewed just about every other person Hakuno laid eyes on as her rival, and hadn't seemed to like it at all.
But Hakuno has never had a rival.
She managed to make friends in the War, as bittersweet as that had turned out, but aside from that they were all opponents. A rival was someone who she could clash and improve with, time and time again. But, from the very start, Hakuno has only had two choices: win or die. Delete or be deleted. And after becoming Sovereign, having something that could rival her position is... well, most likely an extinction-level threat.]
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[ Masamune snaps a little defensively at that. It's not directed at her personally, but he is undoubtedly frustrated.
As a samurai, it makes sense for him to reject such a descriptor. Gilgamesh is no skill, all power.
But, of course, it is a difficult position for Hakuno most of all. She is aware of Gilgamesh's bad side but seen the good as well.
So far, Masamune has seen nothing but the bad and the manipulation. ]
Charisma, huh? Yeah, sounds about right.
[ The little dragon becomes frustrated because he can't speak directly ill of the other: because accusing him of cruel and manipulative rape is only immediately countered with voices hounding him that he consented, that he loved all of it anyway. He was given exactly what he wanted and it was something he only felt resentful towards because he was so addicted to it he was feeling withdrawal.
Besides, shouldn't he feel awful? That person loves him. Is the only person that loves him. Even if he hates him, he will—
(Everything sounds like a lie now, even his own convictions)
]
I really hate him...
[ There is so much venom in Masamune's voice, suggesting it's deep rooted and not fake words, but that he's struggling to say it. Being outside of his manipulative range is the only thing allowing the young lord to even speak in pieces. ]
I just want to die and be left alone, but he won't let me. I can't live like this, I'm a fucking dragon! I can't stand it, it's disgusting how pathetic I am. Even he is going to trash me when he's done— maybe he already has.
[ Shifting a little, he sighs as he considers, almost defeated sounding. ]
So... I don't understand why you would want to bother caring for me. You don't know me and I certainly don't deserve it.
[ He doesn't deserve anything. Isn't that why he's supposed to be so grateful for Gilgamesh?
...But he really likes Hakuno. In fact, she and Yukimura are perhaps more than anyone all he cares about being wanted by on his own merit. Hell, if he could be convinced they really cared—they don't have to desire him, he just wants friends to stay with and curl up with at night and laugh with and fight alongside and protect and be protected and face life as it comes—he thinks he could get over even Gilgamesh instead of feeling an intense need to linger.
(The longer he stays away from the golden King, the better it is for him. ]
Don't worry about it okay? I'm just being a brat and being unfair to him, I guess.
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Not in the way your culture would accept. But he fought, and pillaged, and ruled when the whim took him. And... and in all the thousands and thousands of years he has existed, there has only ever been one individual that he ever truly loved, saw as a friend, viewed as an equal. Just one, and everyone since has just been some form of... of amusement, on one level of another.
[She leans in and wraps her arms around him in a tight hug. There's a protective cast to it, like she can feel the cracks just beneath the surface and is trying to keep them from coming apart through sheer force of will alone. He's so hurt, and it stokes a deep ember of the rage she had felt upon first gaining the memories of her other-world Body. She squeezes him, like one of them might fly away if she lets go.]
Whatever he did to you, whatever he said, don't take his warped, self-indulgent ego as fact. No matter what he thinks, reality doesn't hinge on his point of view; you aren't trash. Whatever he might think or say, you aren't. Historically, people will care about you more, know far more about you than some dusty old legend of Babylon. He's a brat and unfair, automatically, not you. You're... you're my friend, aren't you? So, please don't say such terrible things like you mean them. Because—
[She pulls back just enough to look him in the eye, still not letting him go.]
Because I do care about you, and I get mad when anyone insults the people precious to me. I want to know you more. I want to cherish you more. I don't... I don't want you near someone who can hurt you like this.
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Of course, Masamune listens to her quietly, and while a lot of what she says is hard for him to believe (or maybe not so hard, he doesn't know), what sticks with him is that she is either a really good actor (far better than Gilgamesh, he wouldn't be able to feign this) or is quite sincere. Although he is almost paranoid suspicious now, he smiles a little if only because she doesn't talk like the others. She is straightforward and sincere, wearing her heart on her sleeve. ]
Sorry. [ He says it softly, but sincerely, offering to gently touch his head against hers affectionately. ] I don't want to say unkind things to you.
[ Moving his arm that is caught between their bodies, he wraps it around her to small waist to bring her a boy closer and pull her halfway into his lap. ]
I don't know why, but if that's what you want, how can I say no to you? You are the only one here I've met that holds no judgment for anyone despite fully understanding the situation. [ Of course he feels a special connection to her, too, as she is the one he first became intimidate with here as a result of the world, but... he didn't regret it. She was kind to him and fun and loving, what more could he ask for?
And now, she's really gone out of her way because she was worried about his sleep and ... she has so many better things to do than worry about him. ]
I will not worry you. I will stay away from him. [ Gilgamesh will only notice once he's bored and he has plenty to occupy himself with currently. And he probably won't even care, so really... he's the only one hanging around to be treated badly. ]
I will spend the extra time getting to know you better when you want to, yeah? Because you are also precious to me.
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[She follows his motion and moves more fully onto his lap, nestling her head against his. Some of the tension eases out of her frame at that promise, though it feels like she's started an uphill battle of sorts.]
If you want to, you can stay here. It isn't exactly palatial, and I've got a few others bunking down here too, but... the offer is always, always going to be open. And if there's somewhere else you'd rather be, I can move the futon over there. I just... I want you to be comfortable, instead of hurting.
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When Gilgamesh wants him there he goes back. So why can't he do the same and stay with Hakuno if she wants him here? ]
There is absolutely no place I would rather be. [ Gently, he places a kiss to her temple before returning to having his head nuzzled against hers. ]
I know you are right. You're just the first person who's said it to me. [ Luckily he is not so far gone he can't escape the manipulation with the culprit absent. Someone to remind him that it's not him is apparently what he needs. There aren't that many people who care about anyone enough to do such things without being given reason. And Masamune's is not good with telling others of his weaknesses.
(Because he believes he is a failure, that he wasn't strong enough and he should have been to get away from the Servant. Regardless of everything, what kind of dragon would ever let that happen to them...?) ]
So, yeah, I will stay. As long as I'm not taking up space you need, that is.
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[She kisses him on the cheek, firmly, to make a point and to underline her own affection that much more. It feels increasingly obvious that he needs it, and she's more than happy to oblige.]
Good. Now, say something nice about yourself, and I'll let you finish your treat.
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[ sounds weird, he realizes. He's actually quite cocky when he's himself and so his ego certainly doesn't suffer. However, it's usually not shown in saying flattering things about himself so much as suggesting others aren't up to par.
Still, he seems to take well to her affection, because he's asking as if he needs clarification, not so much that he refuses. He also continues to hold her, not seeming so interested to otherwise part with her being so close. ]
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[She fidgets slightly in his hold, but not in order to get loose. She settles herself in his lap more comfortably once she has her bowl and spoon back in her hands, and loads up a spoonful as she snuggles back against his chest. She raises it up, temptingly.]
One nice thing about you or something you can do, for this. One more for the bento box I originally called you about. And a third one before we go to bed. That seems fair, right?
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[ Masamune exhales as if being put through some trying situation. However there is also a light heartedness to it that suggests it is not viewed in such a way at all. At the very least, he seems happy to be with her, to talk with her and hold onto her in his lap even as he rests his chin on her shoulder to peer at the spoon and bowl Hakuno holds. ]
...I guess but only because you made the bento and you're going to sleep with me. [ otherwise this would be super unfair. ]
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[Well, she's also going to give him the show of actually summoning up the bento, but she'll leave that as a surprise after Slef-Compliment Number Two. She waggles the spoon at him, managing not to dislodge the ice scooped onto it.]
So. Let's hear it, Dragon of Oushu.
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[ He puffs his cheeks a little, them tinging pink, as he tries to think of something nice to say about himself. ]
I'm a good leader.
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[She beams back at him, and obligingly guides the spoon to his mouth, preparing another one as soon as he's eaten it. She'll keep going at whatever pace he likes.]
That wasn't too hard, was it?
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[ Especially since it's not something that can currently be proven otherwise. Still, as he goes to think of another thing... all that comes up is much the same. Battle. War. Violence. Strategy. Everything falls under the same thing: he is a warrior, a weapon seeking blood for power and peace. He's not saying he is going to be bad at everything else outside of war, but considering the most he's done is cool and read and learned a few things here and there of no consequence, it's a fair uncertainty when trying to think of examples.
It doesn't bother him overall, he's confident he'll get by, but it is not helpful with suddenly feeling there is so little to grasp outside the umbrella of war. ]
Everything else I can think of saying falls understand the same category, I guess... I'm a good horseman, I'm good at turning battles around, I'm good at taking advantage of openings... not getting myself killed. Those sorts of things.
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[He's earned his pampering entirely, so she doesn't stop feeding him. When the bowl is empty, he summons up the finest of the Sakura obento series and continues offering him bites from the top layer. Now she's just personally curious, because...
Well, because most of her skills are tied to war, too, but she has never had a childhood preceding it.]
Given the period, I'll bet a lot were for strategy or play-fighting, but...
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I... uh, didn't play much of anything when I was young. The only time I got away from my studies was for training or when I ran off on Kojuro.
[ Which he still felt was totally worth all the punishment for that one time he ran into a bunch of ronin thugs harassing a small Yukimura. ] When I was, it was mostly alone but I guess I did a lot of daydreaming about how I was going to do everything right and make myself known and see my rival again.
[ because tiny Masamune's spent half his life waiting for it to pass to make good on a promise he never thought see. That's one good thing about this place, in addition to meeting Hakuno himself. Considering the last he remembers is being harassed about Yukimura being in the area and him not even knowing it and being used against him, he had to wonder... ]
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[She trails off in thought, and the next bite of food finds its way to her mouth instead. She chews pensively as she reflects on it. Nero had called Elizabeth and Altera her rivals, and had seemed to value the dynamic quite a bit. Tamamo... had viewed just about every other person Hakuno laid eyes on as her rival, and hadn't seemed to like it at all.
But Hakuno has never had a rival.
She managed to make friends in the War, as bittersweet as that had turned out, but aside from that they were all opponents. A rival was someone who she could clash and improve with, time and time again. But, from the very start, Hakuno has only had two choices: win or die. Delete or be deleted. And after becoming Sovereign, having something that could rival her position is... well, most likely an extinction-level threat.]
...that sounds nice. What are they like?